Insights / Communication for Educators
How do I handle a parent who is angry about their child’s marks?
Acknowledge the concern, bring the conversation back to the child’s work, and keep your response steady through interruptions. The discussion should end with what the child needs to work on next, not with defending the marks.
The situation
From explaining to defending.
A parent questions their child’s marks. You begin explaining the marking scheme, but they interrupt. Your voice becomes sharper, and the conversation turns into defending your decision.
The breakdown
The concern gets lost in the defense.
Difficult parent conversations require clarity, listening and control. You need to understand the concern, separate facts from assumptions, explain the issue without unnecessary defensiveness and keep the discussion focused on what happens next.
How I would coach it
Acknowledge, return to the work, stay steady.
I would work on acknowledging the concern, returning to the child’s work and keeping the response steady through interruptions.
Unclear
You begin explaining the marking scheme, the parent interrupts, and your voice becomes sharper.
Clearer
“I understand why you’re concerned. Let’s look at the answers together so I can explain where the marks were lost. Then we can identify what your child needs to work on next.”
Practice
Rehearse it before the PTM.
- Ask a colleague to play the parent.
- Practice the opening response, then ask them to interrupt.
- Return to the child’s work each time, and keep your pace and tone steady.
- Close with what the child needs to work on next.
Keep going
Related reading.
Arjun Lyngdoh · Founder and lead coach of NESkills, with 21 years of communication training. About Arjun
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